Home > Lifestyle, Rant and Rave > This Is My Nightmare: The Dream Edition

This Is My Nightmare: The Dream Edition

Harry Huggins, opinions editor

Note to reader: What follows are not real events; they are things that have happened to me in dreams.

I’m in class; it’s my second grade classroom but my teacher is almost definitely not my second grade teacher. I’m 93 percent sure I never had the dad from “That ’70s Show” teach me spelling, but I’ve been wrong before.

It’s my turn and Red tells me to spell “ephemeral,” a word that in second grade does not exist for most people. Of course, I can’t spell that word, nobody uses it in the real world and I’m left standing and sweating bullets.

Lucky for me, that’s when my best friend from elementary school bursts in the door, the blackboard opens like a cargo-bay in an action movie and we get in a Disney-style theme park ride. Of course, in Disneyland my friend definitely wouldn’t be holding a shotgun and I probably wouldn’t have a medieval sword. Not on a Wednesday, at least.

So here I am in a spooky theme park ride, when ghosts start flying around us. These are not Caspers; these are like the Inferi from the sixth Harry Potter, but they can fly and I don’t have Dumbledore, I have my goofy friend with a shotgun.

My only choice is to start slashing around at ghosts with my sword, and while my friend’s shotgun is pretty much useless, I’m somehow doing just enough damage to keep us alive. Of course, when I see one that looks like a hipster, I finally realize something that brings me back to reality:

This is a nightmare.

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